Becoming real friends

Soul mate

Becoming real friends

You are real friends, aren’t you? Yes, we are soul mates! What do you mean by that? There are different kinds of friendship. The one with shared experiences, memories, interests; where there is mutual recognition of feelings and ideas. There is that feeling of being at home with each other, always being able to call on the other, being there for the other, and standing up for the other.

A friendship can grow, but you can also be disappointed in a friendship. If the give and take are no longer in balance, it can even lead to a rift.

As a child it often starts with sharing secrets together, making a solemn vow together, keeping a hiding place that you share together and that no one else is allowed to know, and also: arguing together and making it up again. In short, being intensely focused on each other.

When you look back on it as an adult, there is often nostalgia: well, it was beautiful, but life has developed very differently than you thought at the time. At some point you started asking your own questions, doing your own quest, and if the other person doesn’t go along with it, you grow apart. That can be a painful process. Eventually, there are no more interfaces, it waters down, and you meet new friends based on new interests and experiences. Yes, that’s life, you say.

A friendship on a common soul base, what is that?  Suppose you are intensively occupied with the why questions: why this life, why my life, what is the intention? And during that search, you meet someone else, or others, who are also working on that, where you find recognition. You come to the realization that it is not about the I, about your I, but about the eternal soul core in your heart. What a joy when you discover that someone else, or several others, also look at this in the same way. You are not alone, you are surrounded by soul mates. There is a common subtle vibration of the heart, a common soul desire, a common higher purpose.

If this idea starts to take shape, if you start to find each other in it more and more, then this goes much further than enjoying the same music, or the same nature, or literature, or whatever. It’s much subtler. It is a corresponding inner knowing to strive for the same high soul goal, and also to know that you can only bring that goal closer together.

Then you become soul mates. You are going to try to meet on the basis of that growing soul principle. On the basis of knowing that we are all on the way, all making mistakes, we are still far from overcoming the self.

You try not to let those I-powers (in yourself and in the other) get the upper hand, but to return again and again to the silence in your heart, to listen to the silent voice of the soul, in you and in the other. At that subtle vibrational level, you are one, it cannot be otherwise. The differences disappear. You are soul mates.

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Date: March 22, 2022
Author: Anneke Stokman-Griever (Netherlands)
Photo: Birmingham-museum-trust on Unsplash CCO

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