For the self, that which I am in truth myself, is full and fulfilled, because it is: everything else passes away, is a coming and going …
But where is this elusive self to be found? [1]
I was unsuspecting when I dared to enter this land. It was not foreseeable that this one trip would become a never-ending story. This travelling in and out of a foreign country is more exhausting and arduous than my entire life before. Every traveller who has ever gone through customs control, wants to put this time-consuming and annoying passage behind him as quickly as possible. But I don’t want to complain, nor do I regret my decision, to have started this tedious story. In the end, it was worth it; my stays are getting longer and the foreign country is gradually turning into a familiar territory. I am allowed to stay here because the awareness of some has familiarised itself with me.
I have undertaken this journey voluntarily, without intention, without prior knowledge, without ideas. I could not have any prior knowledge of the general customs and other things because none of that exists where I come from. What have I not had to go through before I could put my trust in this foreign, self-contained country! My determination to do the whole thing, was born out of love for the people who are desperately searching for fulfilment. They are beings full of deficits, painful holes and inner emptiness who crave fulfilment but can never be fulfilled, because as soon as one hole is filled, another appears.[2] These people are trapped within the borders of their country, which they mistakenly consider to be their home. I alone know where they have their true home and where they find fulfilment. I am constantly sending my message to them and am ready to accompany them on their way home. They do not even have to travel or leave their place of residence.
As soon as someone hears my call I rush to meet them, take them seriously. He opens up to me, lets me in. But pretty soon he sees me as a stranger and sends me away again. How many times have I wandered around and asked myself whether someone from this country will ever really love me. I always endeavour to enter foreign houses properly so as not to shock anyone. That’s why I’m tolerated at first. But from one moment to the next, I’m suddenly out again. Something is wrong, I tell myself. And although it costs me a lot of energy, I patiently start all over again and look for open doors. I want to bring the fullness of life. I know how much people long to be filled with real life. But I cannot stay with them if they do not give me food and full attention but are only preoccupied with themselves.
At first I was surprised that my fullness of life is not readily accessible to people. Then I realised that they are made of a material that makes them blind and weak. Now I know why they can’t see me or hear me, nor understand or follow me. They identify with their bodies, feelings and thoughts without realising how much these are in a constant flow and changing. They are slaves to their sensory impressions.
I then started to make myself noticed. What have I not done to focus people’s attention on the essentials! I have made colours, images and languages available, have created natural phenomena and given impulses to works of art. Philosophy and literature have come into the world through me – everything to bridge the gap between the two shores, which are so infinitely alien to each other.
Like a pilot who knows how to steer ships on safe routes, I accompany people on the crossing to the other shore. Many get stuck on obstacles, on discouraging voices of tormentors or sweet calls of seducers. A whole chorus of voices rises in the heads of those who want to reach the silence of the other shore. One sounds more meaningful and seductive than the other. Particularly irresistible are the sublime, benevolent, the utterly peaceful voices. And then there are the ones that create value and promise success. They sound so pleasant, melt so wonderfully on the tongue, that you don’t want to stop listening to them and get involved with them.
Again and again I have to exercise patience. Only volunteers can travel with me, only people who have already trodden all other paths.
Now you’re probably asking who I am, this strange being who is also trying to help you. You may sometimes notice me when you feel brightness and warmth in the centre of your body, in the region of your heart. I am the little light that is always near you. The door where I am waiting until it opens is in your heart. You can perceive me when you become still and turn away from the thoughts raging in your head. You will meet me when your consciousness recognises and overcomes the obstacles. The foreign country from which I come will suddenly be familiar to you. It fills you with a calmness and vibrancy that you did not know before. You immerse yourself in the peace that you have felt in special moments. Because haven’t you been following me for a long time?
I have been digging deep and long
Mid a horror of filth and mire […]
A voice cried, “Go where none have gone!
Dig deeper, deeper yet
Till thou reach the grim foundation stone
And knock at the keyless gate.”
Sri Aurobindo, A God’s
Labour, Poems Past and Present (5.99)
[1] Satprem, The Way of the Sun. The Key to Conscious
Evolution, 2nd edition, , Paris 2012, p. 35 ff.
[2] Satprem, op. cit.
